Thursday, September 11, 2008

Happy Meals vs Wars of Wills

I am quite sure that I am not the only parent who is having picky-eating-kid problem. My younger tyke, Wei Jin, seems to enjoy gobbling up everything (including curry, sambal and even asam pedas!) that is served to him.

However, my elder little hero, You Jin, is becoming extremely fussy these day. He would kick up a fuss and declare "war" with his food if he sees a harmless shred of vegetable. Tantrum erupts when gravy is drizzled over his rice! Hell breaks lose when he notices a tiny piece of chicken playing peek-a-boo among his rice! There are times when he would eat plain white rice with absolutely nothing but soup. It can be embarassing sometimes especially when you are having your meal in a restaurant. Strangers might have a wrong idea about what is going on: Mommy is ill-treating her kid by feeding him plain rice while she piles up her plate with the sinfully delicious food.

You may call me a bad mommy, but after all the COAXING, BRIBING and even THREATENING...I surrender:(( I've decided not to pursue anymore mealtime battles with him. It's not worth screaming at him for that matter when I finally realise that it's just a matter of phase. It's a sign of my little hero's urge for independence -- MY FOOD, MY CHOICE. (Okay, you win, kiddo)

I did some reading and researchers stated a child who has to fight constantly at the dinning table would tend to become stubborn or defiant. The mealtime battles are not only about food, but are actually war of wills between mother and child. It is also mentioned that if a child is allowed use his own discretion to eat, he will feel more confident and in control. Thus, In-progress actions: 1) let him experiment the taste of various food by himself, 2) sneak his public-enemy no. 1 (vegetable) into the food that he enjoys eating by mashing or pureeing, 3) set good examples for him. I'm trying to make mealtime less stressful now and I'm hoping to see him progress in his food "adventure" phase.


p/s: Yup...I have to admit...I was a picky-eater when I was a little girl. However, I've turned into a food-lover now. After all, it's just a phase;)


limcyam said...

...err sounds familiar!

Lucky for me, that is handled by my home minister's department (wife). Else both the parents will fight!

The only problem... as you had put it.. is eating out!

Mine likes to shout too! Three of them!

Imagine that....

xynthian said...

Ailing, you have got to watch this SUPERNANNY TV show. It's a real eye opener for parents!
No canning involved.

Johnny Ong said...

not easy but still manageable. as they grow there will be certain changes in their life too. bear with it or try to work around it. best thing - enjoy those time

Ai-Ling said...

limcyam: hahaha...i guess most parents will share similar experience. kids are angels, but sometimes they can be mini "monsters", too. it all depends on how the parents handle them:)

xynthian: thnx for the link. u r right, i didn't see any "canning" or caning involved:D btw, i enjoy visiting ur blog. keep it up:)

johnny: i agree with u. it isn't easy to deal with kids, but like what u mentioned, enjoy these moments for they will never be kids forever:)

Blog Widget by LinkWithin